the tiara


I also call it a Queen’s crown because Julie gave it to me when I was one of her queens at her birthday dinner. Nearly two years ago, I sat in that Italian restaurant with Julie and 18 other women. She was at the head of the table, of course. Her theme was to appoint a handful of her friends to be queens of certain spheres. I was her Queen of Spirituality. By wait–there was another. I was shocked–or at least my ego was–because I was the only queen at that table who had to share her sphere with another.

That other, Judy, became my partner. We met that evening at the conclusion of the dinner, literally as people were leaving. The conversation was so special I gave her my email and said, let’s go have coffee sometime and continue this. She did and the rest is her-story.

The tiara has a special place in my home. It sits on the top right end of what has become an altar above my living room fireplace. I could see her every day but most of the time I am too busy to look. But when I do, I remember ……

I am a queen. No matter how tired or stressed. No matter how I look that day or what I am wearing. If I have bathed yet or not. I am a queen! Of my life, of my thoughts, of my feelings. I am the one who decides what I will do each day, whether I will drive somewhere halfway across the county or stay home. For the tiara is a reminder.

This crown came from Cappell’s and cost $1.99. I know because Julie was in a hurry and forgot to take the price tag off. That little label belies the truth of the tiara. It is actually precious–more precious than gold. Even though it is plastic and has not even rhinestones but cheap plastic gems of green and rose and midnight blue. Symbolism is everything; it is the lifeblood of a literature major. Even though those years of mythology and stories were decades ago, I still feel the power of a symbol. I see a queen when I see that tiara. Now the real work has begun–seeing myself as that queen on a regular basis.



4 responses to “the tiara

  1. The power of symbol has been known to mankind/womankind for as long as it has existed. The intuitive, the psychic, and the unknown energy of the Universe manifesting in our own selves. I think it’s a beautiful ritual, Phebe. You may hold the key to spiritual questions for some people. Or maybe that’ll be the theme of your next book!

  2. How wise Julie is, and how prophetic, that she would appoint two equal Queens of Spirituality. And those Spiritual Queens now share love and respect, valuing each other, while living happily ever after, not in a mythology book, but for real. I love true stories of true love.

  3. I am sitting on my front porch drinking coffee, laughing, smiling and feeling warmth in my heart.Yes, I had an intuition about you and Judy and feel honored that MaryFran considers it wisdom. As things unfold I am grateful to realize that YES! our finest moments are not related to materialism, just beautiful people, love, magnificant settings and perhaps, reasonably priced artifacts:)

  4. Thank you for a reminder to us all Queen Phebe.

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