Wow! I just discovered Centre of Gravity, a wonderful group and web presence. Based in Toronto, it also has audio dharma talks and an online presence. A post I just read on Bowing woke me to my missing of my zen roots. There is something about bowing, the simplicity and the reverence. Today I vow to bow . . . to Buddha, my partner, my companion animals. I vow to bow to those I distrust, dislike, don’t understand. I vow to bow to my dissatisfied & disassociated parts. I know–it’s a huge job. Yet it might also be simple…..if I just begin with bowing.
here’s the piece:
OK, I know most of you won’t feel sorry for a young retiree having a busy day today. I pat myself on the back for taking care of odious errands — dental appointment and oil change. These two tasks have been on my list for a long time. There is something freeing about erasing them from both my literal kitchen counter list and my muddled mental one. I followed these up with more pleasant errands like a hair cut, a nutritious smoothie for lunch, a quick ATM stop, and a gratifying elliptical session at the Y.
So it was with consternation that I got home and DIDN’T HAVE MY INTERNET. Yes, I would give up many things — tv, Netflix, and even food, if necessary, to have my wireless connection. Actually, this morning before I left I was able to hop on a neighbor’s wireless to read a few important emails. But when I returned home after a five hour day, I was irritated that I couldn’t check my email. Yes, I’ll be the first to admit: I am addicted. My answer to this is: there are so much worse addictions out there. I don’t want to hear it!
My phone sessions with the Time Warner people began nicely enough but customer service broke down for me when I had to tell the third representative the last four digits of my Social Security number. After talking to two tech people, they finally admitted there was a problem with my cable modem (I knew that). Now I must wait until Sunday to have a house visit (at least they do house visits). I’ll have to lock the dogs up; last time, my shepherd jumped the cable guy when he went into a room to check something after I’d been assured he wouldn’t have to come into the house.
I am now in my neighborhood library branch with my laptop. Fortunately, I could hop on its Cincinnati Bell wireless even though I have Time Warner. Otherwise, I would have to wait in line for the public terminals and peer through a smudged computer screen or sit next to a sexual offender. Whine. I was lucky to have my IPod with me from working out so could tune out not only small children’s voices but also the loud, but helpful, librarian on duty. I am really addicted — I can hear my own voice in my head!
Today has been an opportunity to practice all those Buddhist precepts I took nearly a decade ago: not to kill and steal for starters. Now if I can just get through the weekend without getting ‘intoxicated to the point of heedlessness’ ! I already came close to killing a cable rep with my anger but made sure to use ‘I statements’ : “I know it’s not your fault but I’m frustrated because I’ve already told two other people this same information!” All of this is to say I am being faithful to my blog and writing it early in the evening while the library is still open. Hey, these are four happy kids looking through movies for their evening entertainment. I have to admit they’re pretty cute and even behaving in the library. Maybe I could survive an evening or two without internet and catch up on those movies I have at home. After all, I know how fortunate I am to own a laptop and IPod, have a car to drive to the library branch, and be able to afford internet at home — even if it fails me every now and then.
frustration can sometimes
lead to a new awareness:
things are rarely as bad as they seem.
Posted in 108 poems, Buddhism, gratitude, retirement
Tagged Buddhism, Buddhist precepts, frustration, internet, library, precepts, productivity, Time Warner
First, I want to credit Puerhan for this abundant idea! (He is a poet and architect from the UK. His website: >http://puerhan.blogspot.com/search/label/108P).
For those who don’t know, a mala is a Hindu or Buddhist rosary with 108 beads used for focusing when chanting a mantra. As you touch each bead, the practice (japa) helps to center you and it becomes a kinesthetic experience. Suffice it to say, 108 is an auspicious number in both religions (& there are nearly that many reasons why!)
“Poetry Mala”: a spiritual practice to write a 3 line poem a day for 108 days. As soon as I discovered this idea–this morning via Twitter–I knew it was for me. All quarter in the class I’m taking at Women Writing for (a) Change, I have written few poems. I thought this practice would spark poetry–my biggest love–again. And, after all, it’s only 3 lines, very haiku-ish but with no set rhythm or pattern.
So I shall begin!
108 Poems, #1
Back yard, morning sun shining.
Japa in front of stone circle,
vegetables will be growing soon.