Tag Archives: Shiva

doors / poem 47

“I’m tired of opening that door for you . . . for nothing!” I muttered to the cat. Medusa sometimes acts as if she’d like to go into the basement but usually declines once I open that door for her (you know how haughty queen cats can get). Then I paused, reflecting on what I’d just heard myself say. I imagined God/dess saying the same thing.

Understand – I don’t usually walk around wondering what God/dess would say (WWGS). Although I am deeply spiritual, I don’t belong to any particular church, temple, or synagogue. I practiced Zen meditation for years and they are notorious for the “don’t know” mind and koans. For several years now I have been enthralled with Siddha Yoga. This practice comes from the Hindu tradition. And although I made a pilgrimage to Varanasi, India, holy town of Shiva, one can’t ‘convert’ to Hinduism. I can, however, appreciate and adopt many of its traditions. I believe we ourselves are divine but often forget it. So much for talking to Myself!

So back to this concept of doors. I have been fascinated with doors since the 70s when I read the book and saw the movie Steppenwolf by Herman Hesse. I’ve even had dreams about doors. There is, of course, that old saying “When one door closes another one opens” which I’ve quoted to myself when times got rough. But this assertion I proclaimed to the cat queen was different. I imagined God/dess shaking Her head, muttering something like “How many signs do I have to give the girl before she gets it?!” The Higher Power might even complain “Do I have to drop a key in your blessed lap?!”

Such is the context for tonight’s poem:

if You give me a sign
I might remember
that I’m truly divine

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Remembering India / Poem #11

During meditation this morning, my mind wandered to India. It has been one year and a month since my trip to Varanasi (Banares). I guess it was the tamboura playing in the background that took me there.

Regrets: I wish I could have stayed longer. I wish I hadn’t missed a day being sick. I wish the tour group had all gotten along. I wish I had gone to Sarnath that last day. I wish we had all gone to see that temple with erotic carvings. I wish I could have said goodbye to Raj.

But the trip happened the way it did. I can bring it back any time; it is that real to me. Thus, the context for my three line poem for today, part of my spiritual & literary discipline to write a poem a day for 108 days [see poem #1 below for how it originated, my contact with Puerhan via Twitter].

Varanasi

In the land of Shiva, we visit Durga first.
Floating on the Ganges, we pass the cremation ghat.
Cow grazes calmly in front of the one McDonald’s.

* * * * * * * * * * *  To hear the podcast interview re my trip, go to the Women Writing for (a) Change website:  http://podcast.womenwriting.org/2008/08/12/phebe-2.aspx
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